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View Full Version : Just to lighten things up - Bagdad Bob quotes



catdat
05-17-2004, 07:23 PM
"Even those who live on another planet, if there are such people, would have condemned this action before it started"


"Who is this dog Franks in Qatar?"


"The midget Bush and that Rumsfield deserve only to be beaten with shoes by freedom loving people everywhere."


As for the mercenaries who advanced to the perimeters of Saddam International Airport, I would like to remind you of something. I will mention something that will make the picture clear for you and help you to understand what took place at Saddam International Airport. Most of you probably saw the American movie "Wag the Dog". I hope you remember it. Some of their acts that took place at dawn yesterday and today are similar to what happened in "Wag the Dog". If we succeed in keeping them isolated on that island, and we are determined to do so, we might let them taste a second mini Dien Bien Phu tonight. The European journalists remember it well. Our estimates are that none of them will come out alive unless they surrender to us quickly. They are completely surrounded now. This morning, the number of armoured personnel carriers that were destroyed, along with their occupants, is eight. The number of the tanks destroyed is 11."

Note: August 11 - The LA Times reports that the Iraqi military was itself fooled by the creative reporting of furloughed Iraqi Information Minister Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf (M.S.S.): "After the information minister claimed that Iraqi forces had retaken the Baghdad airport from U.S. troops, two former commanders said, Republican Guard Gen. Mohammed Daash was dispatched to check out a rumor that four or five American tanks had survived the Iraqi counterattack. Daash returned to his headquarters in a panic. "Four or five tanks!'' the commanders quoted Daash as telling his fellow generals. "Are you out of your minds? The whole damn American Army is at the airport!''


The American press is all about lies! All they tell is lies, lies and more lies!"


"Now even the American command is under siege. We are hitting it from the north, east, south and west. We chase them here and they chase us there. But at the end we are the people who are laying siege to them. And it is not them who are besieging us."


"The British forces which were dropped there have been eliminated mostly on the (battle)field, except for those who fled ... It is a complete defeat ... Amazingly the Americans have pushed the British to do that. They pushed them ahead as if it is an experiment. The result was very tragic for the British."
Note: I guess he's trying to refer to the way the russkies used penal battalions in WW2



"They're not even [within] 100 miles [of Baghdad]. They are not in any place. They hold no place in Iraq. This is an illusion ... they are trying to sell to the others an illusion."


"I speak better English than this villain Bush"

want more? catdat

Hullebullen
05-17-2004, 07:34 PM
rofl

The first one has almost a Homer Simpson quality about it...

Ichhabe
05-17-2004, 07:37 PM
"Their stomachs will roast in hell"- I think he also said. Anyway: Good propaganda for desperate times. :D

scm77
05-17-2004, 07:43 PM
http://www.baghdadbobdvd.com
rofl

Here's a bunch of them.
http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljoke-iraqinfominister.htm

I personally like: I blame Al-Jazeera. They are marketing for the Americans :cantbeli:

American Patriot
05-17-2004, 07:50 PM
'We have destroyed 2 tanks, fighter planes, 2 helicopters and their shovels - We have driven them back."

"We made them drink poison last night and Saddam Hussein's soldiers and his great forces gave the Americans a lesson which will not be forgotten by history. Truly."

"They will be burnt. We are going to tackle them"

"Listen, this explosion does not frighten us any longer. The cruise missiles do not frighten anyone. We are catching them like fish in a river. I mean here that over the past two days we managed to shoot down 196 missiles before they hit their target."

"What they say about a breakthrough [in Najaf] is completely an illusion. They are sending their warplanes to fly very low in order to have vibrations on these sacred places . . . they are trying to crack the buildings by flying low over them."

catdat
05-17-2004, 08:01 PM
"they are nowhere near the airport ..they are lost in the desert...they can not read a compass...they are retarded."
Note: If he knew my old Lt maybe...nah


"The authority of the civil defense ... issued a warning to the civilian population not to pick up any of those pencils because they are ****y traps," he said, adding that the British and American forces were "immoral mercenaries" and "war criminals" for such behavior.
"I am not talking about the American people and the British people," he said. "I am talking about those mercenaries. ... They have started throwing those pencils, but they are not pencils, they are ****y traps to kill the children."


"We went into the airport and crushed them, we cleaned the WHOOOLE place out, they were slaughtered"


"The forces of American colonialism began to drop containers that produce a sound explosion, a very huge sound. I remind you that they said that their strategy is based on shock and awe. Those failed ones manufactured a type of container that has an explosive substance, which they drop. They cause a very huge explosion in terms of sound, as if the universe was shaken. After a while, you go out and you don't find anything. You find some nails, screws, pieces of metal, but the important thing here is the sound. Those failed ones think that through the huge sound explosion, people would be shocked and consequently would collapse and be defeated. What happened? The contrary. The fighters..., the masses..., and the heroic sons of the Iraqi tribes discovered this game. They will turn it against the American louts so as to shock them. Wait for surprises, God willing, to see how the US game will fail."


"It has been rumored that we have fired scud missiles into Kuwait. I am here now to tell you, we do not have any scud missiles and I don't know why they were fired into Kuwait."

Update: MSS on Al-Jezeera concerning Saddams capture: "The place where Saddam had been caught is an old hideout, known to many Iraqi leadership members. I don't believe that Saddam used such a very well known hideout". Um...that sh&th@le is a well known hideout? LOL

scm77
05-17-2004, 08:40 PM
"It has been rumored that we have fired scud missiles into Kuwait. I am here now to tell you, we do not have any scud missiles and I don't know why they were fired into Kuwait."

rofl We don't have any missles, and I don't know why we fired them into Kuwait.

That guys the man. woot

usa320
05-17-2004, 09:30 PM
rofl

Secret Squirrel
05-17-2004, 10:33 PM
As for the mercenaries who advanced to the perimeters of Saddam International Airport, I would like to remind you of something. I will mention something that will make the picture clear for you and help you to understand what took place at Saddam International Airport. Most of you probably saw the American movie "Wag the Dog". I hope you remember it. Some of their acts that took place at dawn yesterday and today are similar to what happened in "Wag the Dog". If we succeed in keeping them isolated on that island, and we are determined to do so, we might let them taste a second mini Dien Bien Phu tonight. The European journalists remember it well. Our estimates are that none of them will come out alive unless they surrender to us quickly. They are completely surrounded now. This morning, the number of armoured personnel carriers that were destroyed, along with their occupants, is eight. The number of the tanks destroyed is 11."


werent there Iraqis at the airport but apparently they had fallen asleep and woke up after U.S forces had arrived there? :bash:

AFACadet
05-17-2004, 10:37 PM
rofl

scm77
05-17-2004, 10:45 PM
werent there Iraqis at the airport but apparently they had fallen asleep and woke up after U.S forces had arrived there? :bash:

Yes! I saw that in a doccumentary. The Iraqis were asleep at the far end of the runway at night and the Americans somehow didn't see them. Then in the morning they woke up and the entire airport was swarming with americans. rofl rofl

Secret Squirrel
05-17-2004, 10:48 PM
werent there Iraqis at the airport but apparently they had fallen asleep and woke up after U.S forces had arrived there? :bash:

Yes! I saw that in a doccumentary. The Iraqis were asleep at the far end of the runway at night and the Americans somehow didn't see them. Then in the morning they woke up and the entire airport was swarming with americans. rofl rofl

Now if thats not the def. of "the beginning of a bad day" i dont know what is.

scm77
05-17-2004, 10:53 PM
rofl

dacanadianbomb
05-18-2004, 01:21 AM
If that guy wasnta frikkin psycopath and alianced with Saddam he would be the new Michael Schumacher of comedy, he would blow everyone straight out of the water. And he wouldnt even have to change his job either.He could get a small side show of David Letterman Im sure he would surpass the top ten list.

catdat
05-18-2004, 01:36 AM
http://www.welovetheiraqiinformationminister.com/images/07-minister.jpg

"I triple guarantee you, there are no American soldiers in Baghdad."

n4292936
05-18-2004, 02:01 AM
Hey this guy is great, He had his own websit for a while! Does anyone know what it was? friggin hilarious he was. He apparently got a job working for some news outfit in Dubai! rofl no joke
HEY I FOUND IT
http://www.welovetheiraqiinformationminister.com/
kick ass woot

Abbyy
05-18-2004, 03:17 AM
Don't kick old man. He just tried to do his best during wartime.

http://www.welovetheiraqiinformationminister.com/images/hesback.jpg

n4292936
05-18-2004, 03:50 AM
Sorry mate, but if his best was to spout an Orwelian style of horribly and obviously inaccurate propaganda then it deserves a kicking. I dont fault him for doing his duty, I do fault him for being the lying mouthpiece of a cruel and tortuous regime.... just like Rumsfeld rofl