gc
05-12-2005, 04:36 AM
These are from a book called Disorder in the
American Courts, and are things people actually
said in court, word for word, taken down and now
published by court reporters who had the torment
of staying calm while these exchanges were
actually taking place. rofl
_________________________________
Q: Are you ******ly active?
A: No, I just lie there.
__________________________________
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15th.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
______________________________________
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the
impact?
A : Gucci sweats and sneakers.
______________________________________
Q: This amnesia, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forgot? Can you give us an example of
something that you've forgotten?
_____________________________________
Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty eight or thirty five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty five years.
_____________________________________
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to
you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I Doris?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.
______________________________________
Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been
involved in voodoo or the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.
______________________________________
Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies
in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next
morning?
A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
___________________________________
Q: The youngest son, the twenty year old, how old
is he?
_____________________________________
Q: Were you present when your picture was
taken?
______________________________________
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was
August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
______________________________________
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
______________________________________
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
______________________________________
Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male or a female?
______________________________________
Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant
to a deposition notice which I sent to your
attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you
performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
______________________________________
Q: All your responses must be oral OK. What
school did you go to?
A: Oral.
______________________________________
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the
body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Marshall was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I
was doing an autopsy.
______________________________________
Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
______________________________________
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did
you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A : No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive
when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a
jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive,
nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive
and practicing law somewhere.
American Courts, and are things people actually
said in court, word for word, taken down and now
published by court reporters who had the torment
of staying calm while these exchanges were
actually taking place. rofl
_________________________________
Q: Are you ******ly active?
A: No, I just lie there.
__________________________________
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15th.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
______________________________________
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the
impact?
A : Gucci sweats and sneakers.
______________________________________
Q: This amnesia, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forgot? Can you give us an example of
something that you've forgotten?
_____________________________________
Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty eight or thirty five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty five years.
_____________________________________
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to
you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I Doris?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.
______________________________________
Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been
involved in voodoo or the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.
______________________________________
Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies
in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next
morning?
A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
___________________________________
Q: The youngest son, the twenty year old, how old
is he?
_____________________________________
Q: Were you present when your picture was
taken?
______________________________________
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was
August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
______________________________________
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
______________________________________
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
______________________________________
Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male or a female?
______________________________________
Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant
to a deposition notice which I sent to your
attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you
performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
______________________________________
Q: All your responses must be oral OK. What
school did you go to?
A: Oral.
______________________________________
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the
body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Marshall was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I
was doing an autopsy.
______________________________________
Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
______________________________________
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did
you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A : No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive
when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a
jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive,
nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive
and practicing law somewhere.