Brits are stupid

[gaz]

Allegedly taken from various gameshows -

THE WEAKEST LINK




Anne Robinson: In traffic, what "J" is where two roads meet?
Contestant: Jool carriageway.

Anne Robinson: Which Italian city is overlooked by Vesuvius?
Contestant: Bombay.

Robinson: What insect is commonly found hovering above lakes?
Contestant: Crocodiles.
Robinson: Wh...?
Contestant (interrupting): Pass!

Anne Robinson: In olden times, what were minstrels, travelling
entertainers or chocolate salesmen?
Contestant: Chocolate salesmen.

Robinson: The Bible, the New Testament. The Four Gospels were written by Matthew, Mark, Luke and...?
Contestant: (long pause) Joe?




NATIONAL LOTTERY JET SET



Eamonn Holmes: What's the name of the playwright commonly known by the initials G.B.S.?
Contestant: William Shakespeare.




CHRIS SEARLE SHOW, BBC BRISTOL



Searle: In which European country is Mount Etna?
Caller: Japan.
Searle: I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear
that, I can let you try again.
Caller: Er... Mexico?




FAMILY FORTUNES

1) Something a blind man might use? A Sword
2) A song with the word Moon in the title? Blue Suede Moon
3) Name the capital of France? F
4) Name a bird with a long Neck? Naomi Campbell
5) Name an occupation where you might need a torch? A burglar
6) Where is the Taj Mahal? Opposite the Dental Hospital
7) What is Hitler's first name? Heil
8) A famous Scotsman? Jock
9) Some famous brothers? Bonnie and Clyde.
10) A dangerous race? The Arabs
11) Something that floats in a bath? Water
12) An item of clothing worn by the Three Musketeers? A horse
13) Something you wear on a beach? A deckchair
14) A famous Royal? Mail
15) Something that flies that doesn't have an engine? A bicycle with
wings
16) A famous bridge? The Bridge Over Troubled Waters
17) Something a cat does? Goes to the toilet
18) Something you do in the bathroom? Decorate
19) A method of securing your home? Put the kettle on
20) Something associated with pigs? The Police
21) A sign of the Zodiac? April
22) Something people might be allergic to? Skiing
23) Something you do before you go to bed? Sleep
24) Something you put on walls? A roof
25) Something slippery? A conman
26) A kind of ache? A fillet of fish
27) A jacket potato topping? Jam
28) A food that can be brown or white? A potato
29) Something sold by gypsies? Bananas
30) Something red? My sweater



RADIO LINCS PHONE-IN




Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant: Barcelona.
Presenter: I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant: I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in
Spain.


STEVE WRIGHT SHOW, RADIO 2
Wright: On which continent would you find the River Danube?
Contestant: India.

Wright: What is the Italian word for motorway?
Contestant: Espresso.

Wright: What is the capital of Australia? And it's not Sydney.
Contestant: Sydney.



THIS MORNING
Judy Finnegan: The American TV show 'The Sopranos' is about opera. True or false?
Contestant: True?
Finnegan: No, actually, it's about the Mafia. But it is an American TV show, so I'll give you that.




BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE
Paul Wappat: How long did the Six Day War between Egypt and Israel last?
Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days.






BOB HOPE BIRTHDAY QUIZ, LBC
Presenter: Bob Hope was the fifth of how many sons?
Contestant: Four.






BBC GMR, PHIL WOOD SHOW




Wood: What "K" could be described as the Islamic Bible?
Contestant: Er...
Wood: It's got two syllables... Kor...
Contestant: Blimey?
Wood: Ha ha ha ha no. The past participle of run...
Contestant: (Silence)
Wood: OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I...
Contestant: Walked?


DARYL'S DRIVETIME, VIRGIN RADIO




Daryl Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?
Contestant: Holland?
Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet.
Contestant: Iceland? Ireland?
Denham (helpfully): It's a bad line. Did you say Israel?
Contestant: No.

[Pook2]

Every country has their own.

[wulfstan]

10) A dangerous race? The Arabs :)

[achilles]

Hitler´s first name= Heil, cracked me....i guess most of the stupid answers pop up because players are nervous

[foxtrot023]

4) Name a bird with a long Neck? Naomi Campbell

This one is understandable, and funny as well

[Rantanplan]

3) Name the capital of France? F

Thats brilliant

[Icarus1]

Presenter: Bob Hope was the fifth of how many sons?
Contestant: Four.

hehe

[Herrmannek]

This is Bryliant! Thinks men :)

[Rantanplan]

This is Bryliant! Thinks men :)


Are you british?

[eucalyptus]

Hitler´s first name= Heil, cracked me....i guess most of the stupid answers pop up because players are nervous
x2, rofl rofl almost choked on food laughing at it

[Herrmannek]

Are you british?
Not more than you...

[Versace]

Most brits I met were about as smart as a sack of potatoes.

[Rantanplan]

edit ...............................

[Threelions]

Most brits I met were about as smart as a sack of potatoes.

Same goes for texans mate...

Cheers,
Paul

[Uncle Sam]

Funny stuff. I think there are more dumb people in the world than smart ones.

[moonmonkey]

I love hearing the mistakes people make when their nervous on tv or are just so stupid on the radio

[Shadow]

BREAKINGNEWS : Brits are stupid

http://www.msghelp.net/images/old_news.jpg

[ENSIGN FOREVER]

BRILLIANT!!!!

http://images.usatoday.com/money/_photos/2004/12/27/inside1-guinness.jpg

[DeltaWhisky58]

Allegedly taken from various gameshows -

.

I notice that you didn't select any of the high-intelect programmes, e.g. University Challenge, Mastermind etc. No wonder your opinion is somewhat biased. ;)

I'd like to see how the average American or other national would fair in similar circumstances - pretty much the same if not worse I would wager.

[DeltaWhisky58]

Most brits I met were about as smart as a sack of potatoes.

Have you ever actually met any - would you recognise a sack of potatoes?

:bash:

[moonmonkey]

Have you ever actually met any - would you recognise a sack of potatoes?

:bash:
Thats what texans class as clever - look at G.W.B... rofl

[Raptus_regaliter]

watch it there buddy...

[stuntman]

The answers remind me of the J walking segment on The tonight show with
J Leno

[a_very_ex_STAB]

Most brits I met were about as smart as a sack of potatoes.

This from a nation that elected a shaved chimp into office:roll:

[Hawkeye]

3) Name the capital of France? F

Thats brilliant


x2

Simply hilarious

[MrScruff]

I can assure everyone that the people who appear on such TV shows are of a lower class to most of us and are often segreagated into fenced housing developments where their population growth is strictly kept down to 4 children a month per person.

As for stupid Brits? Anyone been watching Space Cadets?

[ENSIGN FOREVER]

I can assure everyone that the people who appear on such TV shows are of a lower class to most of us and are often segreagated into fenced housing developments where their population growth is strictly kept down to 4 children a month per person.

As for stupid Brits? Anyone been watching Space Cadets?

The concept that intelligence is tied with "class" ought to have been abandoned with George V!:bash:

[W3s II]

British women are hot!

[a_very_ex_STAB]

The concept that intelligence is tied with "class" ought to have been abandoned with George V!:bash:

Why do you think we keep the Royals well fenced in? It's not for their safety you know :)

[a_very_ex_STAB]

British women are hot!

You obviously haven't been living in the places in Britain that I've been living in :)

[Fee Fi Fo Fum]

As for stupid Brits? Anyone been watching Space Cadets?

Yeh mate, its great ain't it. Too bad that bloody moth got into the studio, gonna have to set the sky+ on record tonight.

[Esszett]

Why do you think we keep the Royals well fenced in? It's not for their safety you know :)

rofl

And I always thouht if the Brits were fanatic about anything it was their Royal Family.
You wanna say it isn't true that Brits love class-society and don't think the nobles actually ARE better than the rest?
Amazing.p-)

[a_very_ex_STAB]

rofl

And I always thouht if the Brits were fanatic about anything it was their Royal Family.
You wanna say it isn't true that Brits love class-society and don't think the nobles actually ARE better than the rest?
Amazing.p-)

Actually they're not really our Royal Family. They're a bunch of inbred German tourists who've overstayed their welcome:)

[EsoognomEhT]

Favourite one;
Family Fortunes - "Name a dangerous race?"
"The arabs"


roflroflroflrofl

[Esszett]

Actually they're not really our Royal Family. They're a bunch of inbred German tourists who've overstayed their welcome:)

This might explain why the Queen doesn't laugh very much and just isn't relaxed at all.
Should've known it. One should recognize one's own kind.:)

[Asheren]

I must put a sticky on my comp never eat anything while you browse MP.net

[Graspol]

Actually they're not really our Royal Family. They're a bunch of inbred German tourists who've overstayed their welcome:)


Don't mention the war!!!!

[TheKiwi]

British women are hot!

For hot, substitute 'easy' and you have it about right. :D

Let's not get started on the British teeth issue.

[MBG]

I must put a sticky on my comp never eat anything while you browse MP.net

100% True rofl

[a_very_ex_STAB]

For hot, substitute 'easy' and you have it about right. :D

Let's not get started on the British teeth issue.


Let's not get started on the Kiwis and sheep issue;)

[Major Maxillary]

The world is all fools, smart people are just less foolish than others.

Also, these answers are hilarious, makes me wish i could remember where that list of funny things said in court is.