French Army "Ultimate Surrender" Video Game

[Sixgun Symphony]

http://www.brokennewz.com/images/ultimatesurrender.jpg

Paris - Inspired by the commercial success of the United States Army’s "Boot Camp" video game, the General Staff of the French Army has announced plans to market "Ultimate Surrender," a video game based upon the proud military traditions of the Gauls.

In the game we follow the exploits of Lucky Pierre, an apprentice garlic salesman from Marseilles, as he joins the French Army and begins a rigorous course of combat training. The First Level of the game is called "Survival School," and the players have to help Lucky Pierre survive 24 hours without red wine or crème brulé. The Second Level is "Capitulation," and the goal here is to see which player can have Lucky Pierre surrender the fastest without firing a shot or getting his uniform dirty. Level Three is "Collaboration." Here the players battle to see who can collect the largest numbers of pairs of nylon stockings and packages of chocolates by having Lucky Pierre perform ****** favors for members of the occupying forces. Level Four is "Be Ungrateful to America for Rescuing Your Sorry French Ass Once Again." In this extremely challenging part of the game contestants vie with one another to see who can make Lucky Pierre behave in the surliest manner when the United States inevitably comes to the rescue of the defeated French. The Final Level is "Pretending to Have Been in the Resistance." Here contestants compete in a battle of tall tales and whoppers as they try to protect Lucky Pierre from treason charges.

http://www.brokennewz.com/images/frenchscreenshot.jpg

Marketing tests show that "Ultimate Surrender" is a big hit with French teenagers and young adults who are too young to have experienced France’s lightening surrender to the Germans in 1940 or its defeat by the Vietnamese in 1954 at Dien Bien Phu. "Zees is a great tool to inspire ze patriotism in ze youths, n’est ce pas?" said General Jean-Jacques Loseur, Commander-in-Chief of the French Army, during his weekly press conference. "Since ze end of ze Cold War we French have not had many opportunities to surrender or to show great cowardice in the face of much weaker opponents."

When questioned about comments made in the French Chamber of Deputies that "Ultimate Surrender" makes the French Army look like a bunch of gutless mama’s boys, General Loseur pulled out a white handkerchief, put his hands over his head and said, "Oh heck, I give up."

MORE (http://www.brokennewz.com/worldnews/surrender.asp)

[Seraphim]

Looks like a M1 Garand.

[Argyll]

What exactly is your problem with everyone that is not a white American Republican?

[Maverick77]

When your not Muslim or African and you still get destroyed in every battle you fight in.

You deserve stupid **** like this.


btw that modded screenshot is from Day of Defeat.

good game

[Ratamacue]

That was retarded.

[Argyll]

Extremely!
Until you've actually served alongside other Nations you are in no position to judge other Countries Armies.

[EvanL]

I think its safe to say that this guy is an idiot and we need not pay him any attention.

[Seraphim]

Who we talking about?

[ChuckThunder]

Extremely!
Until you've actually served alongside other Nations you are in no position to judge other Countries Armies.

Well said. Also the French have the best MREs, no joke.

[Guttorm]

:bash:

[Yard Ape]

What exactly is your problem with everyone that is not a white American Republican?

Xenophobia

[Rantanplan]

Ban him!!! :bash:

[EvanL]

Ban him!!! :bash:
http://img1.photobucket.com/albums/v40/Rantanplan/Midtown2.gif
Classic my friend.. Classic!

[Sixgun Symphony]

rofl rofl rofl

[AFG]

jeeez this is hella old. IIRC this was out even when America's Army was announced, not released yet which is like almost 2 years ago!!!!

[California Joe]

Do you ever take a break from being an asshole? I find it hard to believe you would have lived this long if you opened your cockholster in real life to say some of the stupid **** you say in here.

[George W. Bush]

http://starterupsteve.servepics.com/funny7/French-Military-magazine.jpg

[Rantanplan]

http://www.green-heaven.de/G/lol1.gif

[AK-Lover]

Ha, French military sucks ass! And CJ what the **** is a ****ing cockholster?! rofl rofl
****ing COCKHOLSTER! rofl rofl rofl
More like you're a ****ING ****!!! rofl rofl rofl
No Seriuosly, I completely agree with Sixgun. woot

[Midtown]

I sure do have *** with alot of women for being a faggot.
Oh well I can look at that and laff, Id rather see my face on a smileys sign, then 45 ****ing canadian symbols on evans. (no offence to canadians, but that ****s overkill)

[California Joe]

Are you related to serbian boy?

Or just some crackhead with a smiley fetish and bad coping skills.

As for the definition of a cockholster you polesmoker, look in the mirror and say "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

[Rantanplan]

Its a damn shame what happend to this forum.

[AK-Lover]

For you CJ: Smoking ****s can be hazardous to you're health you can experience cold sores or even get AIDS, beaware sperm is highly addictive to people like joe. - Surgeon generals warning rofl rofl

[Beowulf]

Are you related to serbian boy?

Or just some crackhead with a smiley fetish and bad coping skills.

As for the definition of a cockholster you polesmoker, look in the mirror and say "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

He is serbian Boy.

[California Joe]

No mistaking the eloquent manner in which he communicates. Goofy bastard.

[Rantanplan]

Are you related to serbian boy?

Or just some crackhead with a smiley fetish and bad coping skills.

As for the definition of a cockholster you polesmoker, look in the mirror and say "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

He is serbian Boy.


Well, so could you please bann him.

[Salty Dog]

you're a good man joe. serbian boy just f***ing die already.

[EvanL]

I sure do have *** with alot of women for being a faggot.
Oh well I can look at that and laff, Id rather see my face on a smileys sign, then 45 f*** canadian symbols on evans. (no offence to canadians, but that ****s overkill)
2 canadian symbols is hardly overkill my friend.
And its alot better than having the worst hockey team in the NHL as a banner.
anyways lets not get off topic here. If you wanna complain send me a PM. Dont be a little bitch and waste bandwidth.

[hank]

For you CJ: Smoking ****s can be hazardous to you're health you can experience cold sores or even get AIDS, beaware sperm is highly addictive to people like joe. - Surgeon generals warning rofl rofl

bosnian girl - still haven't kicked that coke habit - how many cans today?

Here is a tip:

you're = your are not your

check it out - grammar is really quite popular these days

[morlick]

serbian fag & his girlfriend sixgun=two little ****

[Shake n Bake]

LOL good ****, SS!

[memphiz]

I sure do have *** with alot of women for being a faggot.
Oh well I can look at that and laff, Id rather see my face on a smileys sign, then 45 f*** canadian symbols on evans. (no offence to canadians, but that ****s overkill)
2 canadian symbols is hardly overkill my friend.
And its alot better than having the worst hockey team in the NHL as a banner.
anyways lets not get off topic here. If you wanna complain send me a PM. Dont be a little bitch and waste bandwidth.
yeh i have to agree on the hockey banner, the Wild do suck donkey balls

[DE_Six]

Ha, French military sucks ass! And CJ what the f*** is a f*** cockholster?!


I was about to say that you are a fine example of a c*ckholster, but that is much offending and rude to other c*ckholsters worldwide. A**clown. I wish you ran into a bunch of angry French Paras.

[Argyll]

AK-Lover/Serbian boy.............please read the forum rules..........carefully!!

Quit the Insults
Quit the racism
Quit the profanities
Quit trolling

Start posting informative posts,and pictures,and prove to the forum members that you are worthy of being a member here ;)

[AK-Lover]

Okay, first CJ insulted me, and second WHO THE HELL IS SERBIAN BOY?! I"M A SERB-RUSSIAN okay? I DO NOT KNOW ANY SERBIAN BOY? And I only asked joe what a cockholster is, he is the one being racist. :|

[Rantanplan]

I'm sure Argyll checked already your ID, Dumbfvck!

[Argyll]

No Beowulf did,they are the same person it seems!

AK Lover,I've seen your rants in other threads,and you have been abusive and racist.
Cockholster is not racist either unless you happen to be an ethnic cokholster.

[AK-Lover]

Alright sorry, but if somebody makes racist or rude comments about me or people I like on this forum such as sixgun, PermskiOMON, kingpin and some other guys what the hell am I supposed to do huh? :(

[Salty Dog]

Alright sorry, but if somebody makes racist or rude comments about me or people I like on this forum such as sixgun, PermskiOMON, kingpin and some other guys what the hell am I supposed to do huh? :(

keep your mouth shut and let the moderators deal with the other parties involved, it would seem.

[Seraphim]

Alright sorry, but if somebody makes racist or rude comments about me or people I like on this forum such as sixgun, PermskiOMON, kingpin and some other guys what the hell am I supposed to do huh? :(

Im guessing the reason PermskiOMON left was because of you. The forum lost much knowledge when he left. I wish the mods/admin had done something beforehand.

[Argyll]

Perksimon was beggining to get very very abusive in his posts which was a shame as he also posted some great stuff,

AK Lover,if you start respecting the rules and the other forum members then there's no problem! ;)

[Herrmannek]

Perksimon was beggining to get very very abusive in his posts which was a shame as he also posted some great stuff,

AK Lover,if you start respecting the rules and the other forum members then there's no problem! ;)

THere is no worst thing on forum than moderator with feel of mission :)...
I hope you will not ban me "accidentaly"..because I'm addicted...this would kill me :)

BTW I'm kidding...but I was banned once...this was traumatic experience..esspecialy I done nothing wrong :)

[Beowulf]

... WHO THE HELL IS SERBIAN BOY?! I"M A SERB-RUSSIAN okay? I DO NOT KNOW ANY SERBIAN BOY?... :|

Hey wiseass, it's called an IP address, changing your screenname doesn't mean jack.

[Rantanplan]

Idiot :cantbeli:

[Argyll]

Perksimon was beggining to get very very abusive in his posts which was a shame as he also posted some great stuff,

AK Lover,if you start respecting the rules and the other forum members then there's no problem! ;)

THere is no worst thing on forum than moderator with feel of mission :)...
I hope you will not ban me "accidentaly"..because I'm addicted...this would kill me :)

BTW I'm kidding...but I was banned once...this was traumatic experience..esspecialy I done nothing wrong :)

Believe me guys last thing i want to do is start cracking the whip,but I simply cannot tolerate the amount of racism this site has seen in rescent months,it's spoiling it for everyone,this is my fave site,and I like 99% of people here,some are really funny guys,but they never cross the line,it's when that line gets crossed it starts to get ugly!!

[Seraphim]

Ya hes probably 10 or 11.

[AK-Lover]

Yah and your probably what? 5? :D

[Kriz]

... WHO THE HELL IS SERBIAN BOY?! I"M A SERB-RUSSIAN okay? I DO NOT KNOW ANY SERBIAN BOY?... :|

Hey wiseass, it's called an IP address, changing your screenname doesn't mean jack.
rofl

[Haiw]

Alright sorry, but if somebody makes racist or rude comments about me or people I like on this forum such as sixgun, PermskiOMON, kingpin and some other guys what the hell am I supposed to do huh? :(
serbian boy likes Sixgun...
rofl
I knew he was a complete morron.
Now he confirmed it once again.

Now bend over to take Argyll's ban-stick up the ass.

[memphiz]

so Permskii's gone :( he had great pics

[Haiw]

Great pics...not so great textual contribution... :|

[Kenshin]

we're sure gonna miss him.

[Seoulstriker]

please don't tell me Argyll banned him. :bash:

[He219]

please don't tell me Argyll banned him. :bash:

Relax, Seoul. PermskiiOMON is still (http://www.militaryphotos.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=9588) posting ...

;)

[AK-Lover]

We'd miss him more than Haiw thats for sure! :P

[Kenshin]

We'd miss him more than Haiw thats for sure! :P

...we may not even miss you either.

[AK-Lover]

Hey, to be truthful I bet most of you wouldn't. Especially my dear friend Haiw! :lol: :P

[MVSpartan117]

I would sure like to see you go

[AK-Lover]

I'm sorry to hear that, is it because I speak the truth, I know the truth hurts I'm sorry! :lol: :P

[MVSpartan117]

I'm sorry to hear that, is it because I speak the truth, I know the truth hurts I'm sorry! :lol: :P

I think the thing that made me really not like you was your "joke" about the shuttle.

Also you use damn smilies way too much, especially laughing ones and the hugging one.

[AK-Lover]

Alright why you hatin' :(

[He219]

Just watch your tone and language, AK-Lover, and we won't have any problems!

Review Forum Rule #1 and #2 (http://www.militaryphotos.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=2772)

p-)

[Seoulstriker]

please don't tell me Argyll banned him. :bash:

Relax, Seoul. PermskiiOMON is still (http://www.militaryphotos.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=9588) posting ...

;)


phew! i thought we had lost one of the good guys again. ;) woot

[AK-Lover]

Alright! I think I can do that! :D

[ibstolidude]

... WHO THE HELL IS SERBIAN BOY?! I"M A SERB-RUSSIAN okay? I DO NOT KNOW ANY SERBIAN BOY?... :|

Hey wiseass, it's called an IP address, changing your screenname doesn't mean jack.

Just because Beowulf isn't smart, handsome, rich, charismatic, popular, well-liked, free from rank odor, or what one may call "adjusted to social interaction" doesn't mean he isn't more resourceful than most.






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http://www.freehomepages.com/aawavs/doh.wav

[memphiz]

... WHO THE HELL IS SERBIAN BOY?! I"M A SERB-RUSSIAN okay? I DO NOT KNOW ANY SERBIAN BOY?... :|

Hey wiseass, it's called an IP address, changing your screenname doesn't mean jack.

Just because Beowulf isn't smart, handsome, rich, charismatic, popular, well-liked, free from rank odor, or what one may call "adjusted to social interaction" doesn't mean he isn't more resourceful than most.






-----------------------
http://www.freehomepages.com/aawavs/doh.wav
he's gonna ban you :D ;)

[usa320]

This thread....well, its gay.

[Yard Ape]

http://ebaumsworld.com/forumfun/sucks13.jpg

[[AFSOC]]

I dunt know about you but isnt ironic how you people diss the French so much because they chose not to support us in iraq....

lil history....the FRENCH FRIGGIN HELPED US TO BECOME INDEPENDENT, soo stopp posting gay **** like this....

seriouslyy its annoying and old....

[Midtown]

I sure do have *** with alot of women for being a faggot.
Oh well I can look at that and laff, Id rather see my face on a smileys sign, then 45 f*** canadian symbols on evans. (no offence to canadians, but that ****s overkill)
2 canadian symbols is hardly overkill my friend.
And its alot better than having the worst hockey team in the NHL as a banner.
anyways lets not get off topic here. If you wanna complain send me a PM. Dont be a little bitch and waste bandwidth.
yeh i have to agree on the hockey banner, the Wild do suck donkey balls

Anyone who lives in a country that considers Cloutier a goalie obviosly knows niether jack, nor ****.

[Haiw]

I think serbian AK-loverboy likes me.

[Guttorm]

I would just love to see the french bashers try to prove their point to French paras, face to face.... :D

[Schwabo Elite]

...Or try to articulate in French as mean as the French do in English... :P ;)

Nation-bashing is lame... Didn't bring us any further since the last Ice Age.

SE

[EvanL]

I sure do have *** with alot of women for being a faggot.
Oh well I can look at that and laff, Id rather see my face on a smileys sign, then 45 f*** canadian symbols on evans. (no offence to canadians, but that ****s overkill)
2 canadian symbols is hardly overkill my friend.
And its alot better than having the worst hockey team in the NHL as a banner.
anyways lets not get off topic here. If you wanna complain send me a PM. Dont be a little bitch and waste bandwidth.
yeh i have to agree on the hockey banner, the Wild do suck donkey balls

Anyone who lives in a country that considers Cloutier a goalie obviosly knows niether jack, nor ****.
Anybody who lives in a country that knows jack about hockey oviously shouldnt speak like they are some sort of proffesor on the subject.
Right here raspberry face http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:sEhQxomhqNwJ:www.aperfectworld.org/clipart/gestures/middlefinger.gif

[WARPIG]

How is this thread still kicking?


"French horse**** is better than American horse****!" "French hor**** is lame!...Neener neener!" "Hey.. what about Canadian horse****.. don't forget us!... cmon guys pay attention to me ...I'm a Canadian..eh?"


Guess what it all stinks.
Didn't hood already put the warning out?

Anyone posting another "FRENCHIES SUCK!" graphic, image, 3 post diatribe, or commentary will be banned without warning.

This community represents a very large number of countries all with faults and strengths. No more idiotic banter and name calling will be tolerated.

Sixgun Symphony, consider this your warning.