Another one of my "Craziest ______ stories?" threads...
When I was going from JFK-Puerto Rico, our pilot told said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we have to turn around because we forgot to pick up our US Federal Air Marshall." Blew his cover, so when we landed, we were brought over to another plane where a different Air Marshall came aboard, still undercover. Pilot got in deep deep ****.
Then on THAT flight, the toliet backed up so the entire 4.5 hour trip smelled like **** and vomit.
When we were returning from Puerto Rico, our flight was completely filled up, and so were the remaining 10 for direct service to JFK, but we could be re-routed from San Juan-Orlando-JFK. The catch was, Hurricane Charlie was ready to smack up Central Florida the next day. Oblivious to the weather, we hopped on, and the second we stepped off the plane, the intercom breaks the news, "To our valued travelers, as you may know, Hurricane Charlie is prepared to get a direct hit on the Orlando area. Consequently, all of our flights have been grounded and the in-airport hotel is filled to capacity. We apoligize for the inconvience." All the terminals and gift shops were full, so me and my family grabbed some room on the monorail. During the hurricane, I was watching the hangars getting smacked around the tarmac and palm trees flying through the big glass windows in the terminals and water pour into the place. Everybody panicked and ran around like Rambo walked into the room. After the storm, NG Blackhawks and Humvees were all over the place. National Guardsmen began patrolling the wrecked-up airport so people didn't go crazy on each other and would stop looting the food from the restaurants. This one National Guardsmen was toting a frikin M-60. We were stuck with about 80-something people on the monorail for 36 hours, but my Grandma who lives in nearby Poinciana managed to get by the National Guard and pick us up. Otherwise, we'd be there for nearly a week.
I was flying from LaGuardia-Orlando (this route alwasys gets me terrible luck). We get to the ticket booth, grab our boarding passes and then BOOM! The Great NorthEast Blackout happens when we were in the security line. I was stuck at LaGuardia in the 110 degree plus hallways, sleeping on the floor for two days, surviving off of S'barros and IHOP vouchers. But I met these disgustingly hot sorority chicks headed to Cancun. Got their numbers too. That was the only positive part about the entire trip.
Anyways, we had a connecting flight in Atlanta. The plane from LaGuardia didn't leave until about 10 p.m., so we could only get the last flight of the night. Well, those assholes from AirTran shifted our reservations on to the wait list, which was 138 people long. We were number 126. Me and 134 people slept in the terminal, and if you've ever traveled by airplane you know that the terminals are freezing. Well this was DEATHLY cold. I saw my breath on a few occasions. We were given vouchers for free breakfast at Popeyes. Thank GOD the northeast doesn't have too many of them because I've never had so much grease in my life. I was able to squeeze the sausage, egg and cheese and a puddle of grease filled the indent of my palm. The grits were bangin', though. After waiting until 11:30 am the next morning for the wait list to clear up, we finally got on.
wait so where do you live, new york or orlando? im confused
anyway the funniest thing was when my brother got stuck in the bathroom on the airplane, the pilot had to come down with a friggin nascar tool kit to get the door open, my brother was screamig so loud the whole plane was wondering wtf was going on in there, OMG i wish i would have filmed it
My little story happens to be "summer camp" but not the yawn conventional story. When i was 14 or 15 the local church here offered a bustrip to russia with a bit of a cultural exchange and everything. Sports and stuff. We were 50. Most of my friends came there.
Needless to say a bustrip to a town 200km east of Moscow takes at least 60 hours. Whatever. blah blah long story short. It was the year they had 'problems' in belarus (uprising). Nobody really knew, calling home was nearly impossible from that place (needless to say it was pre cellphone). It just happened that we had a final party there together with another german group from another city and some russians when suddenly the bus came the day before we actually had to leave. The drivers seemed pretty nervous and we entered the bus together with the other group and had to leave and get our stuff packed within 30 minutes. It turned out the main problem was that gas was probably not available to cross belarus if we'd wait another day.
When we drove to russia we had three days. 2 nights in hotels. This time they had to drive nonstop from moscow to at least Poland and then to Berlin. No stay anymore. We watched maybe 20 movies nonstop in the bus.
Then the trouble started. One girl from the other group was asmathic and almost lost conciousness from time to time. It became serious and we just hopped from hospital to hospital. Between russia and Poland stretching the trip and our nerves. There were also minor problems like nobody telling us kids not to buy an military stuff there. Especially (softair?) guns and russian BDU's. (the old fashioned softairs of course not that fancy stuff) A bribe was even planned to not wait ten hours at the customs so we got away unchecked.
The problem just was that if you once being suspicious they could have kept us there for a while.
When we entered germany an Bundeswehr rescue helicopter came and picked up the girl. We thought it was really cool... "wow look at the Vietnam-chopper " (it was a Bell UH1D) Actually it wasn't. Like i said the parents of the girl (pre cell phone era) could not be reached. And when she was in Berlin in the hospital they were not at home to answer the phone. When we got out of the Bus 7 hours later her parents had to find out their daughter was 600km away in a hospital.
The trip from Moscow to Düsseldorf lasted about 75 hours. I'm not kidding you. I could scan all the pics. Especially the rescue helicopter!
After all we had a fun adventure trip. Our parents said later they should have never allowed the trip. Anyway it was great.
Best story comes from my trip this July, San Fransisco to New York by car. After parking on Walmart parking lots all over the country overnight for free, the Walmart in Green Acres (New York) wasn't sure about it. So we asked the police, who had a post on the parking lot. They said it was cool, we parked there. Next few days all the squad cars passed at least once, to see for themselves. After a day or 2 we began to know the cars, who was on duty at what time, etc. We talked to them when they came to change for their shift and so on. I once said we hadn't found real NY pizza. So off they go, lights and sirens, to return 8 minutes later with a giant pizza. The next morning we wake up after we hear banging on the door, another shift got us bagles. The last evening a squad car stopped and they gave us Dunkin' Donuts
I think it's a story very representative of our trip, even though we saw alot of clichés (cops and doughnuts) we also noticed how friendly everyone was. Best trip evah!
I was in Bratislava (The capital of Slovakia for the terminally stupid) having a beer in a bar where it appeared to be eighties night. They had a huge video wall showing a Rick Astley video, so I was actually looking at a Rick Astley that was larger than life, he must have been eight feet tall.
I sent a text message home to my brother that essentially said "This is the most surreal thing I've ever seen, I'm in Eastern Europe staring at a giant Rick Astley".
We left that bar and found another one which we loved since our waitress Lenka was (And still is) the most beautiful girl I've ever seen in my life. About ten minutes later an old man walked into the bar with a ferret on a lead. Just to explain, that's not a euphemism for something, there was a small brown ferret running across the floor on a long leather lead.
At this point I started sending a text message to my brother saying "No, THIS is the most surreal thing I've ever seen...."
The Internet. Where boys are boys, boys are men, and 14 year old girls are the FBI.
Taxi ride from Cairo to El-Terabeen, Sinai.
About a 100km from Cairo, the driver pulls in at a gasstation out in the desert, apparently the taxi has broken down. Taxi driver says: No worries, my friends. I have good friend here. He drive you to El-Terabeen.
So we get into the other cab, together with a bunch of bedouins. I'm getting a bit worried because there are more of them than there are of us. The fact that the driver and the other four guys are chain-smoking joints doesn't do anything to ease up my tension. After a couple of hours of reckless midnight driving the cab suddenly stops in the middle of desert. I'm now convinced we are going to be robbed and left in the desert, or worse...
...what happens is that one the bedouins gets off. We ask the driver why. He says the guy lives there. It's a moonlit desert night and there is no visible signs of human life nearby for miles. We're like:OK...
Anyway, the rest of those guys drops of later. The driver continues to press his little, banged-up Peugot in 150km/h through blind curves and a road that would we meet traffic going the other way, we would crash for certain, and finally we got where we were supposed be...
...best part is that he nearly threw a fit when we didn't tip him enough. He was just screaming: Tipsi! Tipsi!
BANNED FOR LIFE FROM MP.NET for being a total dork.
I went to China for four days and only saw like one bicycle. Also I went to a McDonald's in Beijing and they started playing Britney Spears music.
Finally, the majority of the Chinese soldiers I saw were wearing their own shoes in their uniforms. Ironically the country that manufacturers the majority of our footwear here in the US can't afford to outfit its own soldiers in proper boots.
Went out one night while working in Mexico City... went to a strip club (Solid Gold in Insurentes for those interested) and got a 4 hour lap dance from a Hungarian chick who would stick her chest in my face and then read from an Hungarian-English Dictionary which was on a shelf over my head, to figure out what I was saying to her. At the end of the night she asked me If I'd marry her so that she could come to her America with her son... I told her that they're wouldn't be enough room for her and her son in my girlfriends apartment and left the club.
When we left the club with the guys I was with, we were driving back to the hotel and were pulled over by a Mexico City cop who demanded I give him 1000 pesos (100 bucks) or I was going to jail. Luckily I paid the stripper at the club with my American Expresss, so I still had enough pesos to bribe the cop.
When I was 15 I flew alone to the U.S. so I could meet up with my mother who was in Norfolk at some work related thing. So, when I landed in Baltimore I found out that my connecting flight to Norfolk had been canceled. Meanwhile my mom went to the airport in Norfolk to pick me up but I wasn't there, obviously. She talked to some airline rep there and he got all upset because I was a minor, so he called Baltimore and told them to put me in taxi, to Norfolk. The Chinese cab driver laughed when he was told to take me to Norfolk, since it's a 4 hour drive. Well, he drove me to Norfolk and the airline paid the cab fare, which was $400. That was the most expensive cab ride I've been on.